Mom - Payne Family Traditions - 2008

Traditions are a wonderful way to connect generations as well as adding continuity and predictability to a sometimes uncertain and often chaotic life. We started our marriage with some strong traditions from our parents and families, and over these past 35 years, have built on and added to those, creating our own Payne family traditions.

Music is a tradition that we both brought into the family, Dad with his years on the trumpet and me with my singing and teaching music. The children all took music lessons on the piano and, for most of them, another instrument. Practicing was not a choice – it was a forced march! Our goal was for them to be able to play at church.

We have been a singing family. When the older children were young, I suspect their dad’s was the voice they heard more often with incidental music around the house. We sang a lot to the children and with the children. As the children will attest, they often were coerced into singing together in public as a family. A favorite singing moment was when the boys, grown into men, sang a male quartet at Daniel’s homecoming while Daniel signed. The congregation was mesmerized and touched.

Paynes have a tradition of talking, as if they know what they’re talking about! The children debated in high school, entered speech contests, traveled to distant places to talk. They also performed on stage in various theatre productions. These activities carried on the tradition of theatrics from parents who did the same. We look for great performances in the next generation.

Another tradition the children took up and are passing on to their children is that of service. Our Kansas Family of Builders award from the Kiwanis Club was an award that recognized not only the community service of Dad, but of all of us, even the children.

Church service has always been important to the Paynes. From Grandpa Payne’s 30 years as a scout master to Grandpa Haglund being president of the Pioneer District in Iowa, the family has valued church service. With Dad serving in bishoprics and stake presidencies, there were many years when the children didn’t see Dad much on Sundays. They have followed suit by serving as teenagers in our various wards, going on missions, and continuing to serve wherever they are.

Another favorite pastime is eating. We have talked about that in our previous chapter, but it seemed important to say that the Paynes love to eat. We have always eaten well. Even when money was scarce, there was always enough food to go around. We’ve gardened, canned, frozen, and dried fruits and vegetables. And we always had good meat and, yes Regent, lots of it. Ice cream is another staple at the Payne house. Drop over some evening and share a bowl with us.

We’ve always enjoyed being together as a family. Family Home Evening was a regular occurrence at our house. We loved the lessons taught by the children, as everybody took a turn teaching. In Family Home Evening, the kids learned to be fine teachers, how to conduct music really well, how to sing the hymns and Primary songs, and how to plan and run a meeting. Family Home Evening was a wonderful survival technique for us.

I have to mention the tradition of school. Since the children were tiny, school has been a part of their lives, because every day Dad went to school. Education and higher education has been important to us. Getting bad grades would never have been an option. The kids have all made us proud with their performance academically. They are educated, interesting people. That tradition has been handed to them from generations gone before. We are grateful for the blessing of education and knowledge in our lives.

I am thankful for the tradition of priesthood. We have been blessed by fathers, brothers, uncles, and grandparents who honored their priesthood and blessed their families by righteously exercising that priesthood. From blessings when the children were sick to blessings at passage moments in their lives, we are grateful for Dad’s priesthood.

Thanks for being a wonderful father. Happy Father’s Day,
Grettle